Pet Names and Person Names

[R. Daniel 01]

Sometimes I call my dog, Gus, poochybutt, fuzzybean, smellydoops, and all manners of combinations using, butt, fuzz , and smelly. When he irritates me, I use even more unflattering names, like shithead and fuckface. Of course, he loves me anyway.

Anybody else have ridiculous things they call their pets?

Also ridiculous names in general. Like Frank Zappa naming one of his sons Moon Unit.

[Yuko-san]

Well this is an interesting side of you.

But yeah I got funny names for my pets. I call Brooke, the medium sized girly dog, Brooky or fluff ball or chair stealer (she hops into my lazy-boy when I'm not in it). As for 8-ball, my crazy ass rottweiler, I call him boo-boo, tazmo, fluffball 2 or dammit get back here. I call both of them furball.

[The Final Negotiator]

My parents have a cat, Misty, that I affectionally call "Rug-rat" because of how fast she moves. (She's a snow leopard bengal-siamese mix cat.) If she starts pawing at me and scratches me, I reprimand her, calling her "Quick-Claw" and tapping her on the head with my finger (sometimes getting scratched again by her 1/4" claws).

We've pretty much adopted my wifes brother's cat, Zoro (a Maine Coon, with a 2-ft. reach!), since her brother moved from Dallas, TX back to Connecticut. The when we visited Dallas last year, her brother called Zoro by saying "Hey Buddy". When he brought Zoro to us this year (one renter wasn't thrilled will sharing the house with a cat), he still called him by saying "Hey Buddy". However, he doesn't come to me if I say "Hey Buddy". So, I started referring to him as "Buddy Boy", especially if he meows at me, and now he comes over. Sometimes we call him "Z-Man". I know what your thinking, but no, my wife's brother isn't a One Piece fan, he just mispelled the name of the legendary swordsman, Zorro. It's funny he's named after Zorro, because he's declawed on all 4-feet (per the renter's regulations at an apartment my wife's brother once rented). However, he still "strenghtens his 'nails'" on apolstered furniture like clawed cats, and he still tries to bite if annoyed too much.

A friend of mine who once lived in Alaska (Air Force-Elmendorf) named his dogs Kenai (Pom-Poodle - small, light, fast) and Denali (huge Norwegian Elkhound mix, now deceased  ). We used to call Denali "Nally", but my friend used to call her "Horse" since she was huge. Denali would plop her huge paw on your leg for attention, and would slurp your face when you weren't looking.

[R. Daniel 01]

I'm sorry, Negotiator, but those names just aren't ridiculous enough.

Boo-boo, Tazmo, and Damnit Get Back Here are all wonderful additions.

I add Mr. Goodpants to the collection.

[Sharpshooter005]

One of my cats is named after a celtic war goddess despite being like slightly bigger than my foot.

[R. Daniel 01]

One of my cats is named after a celtic war goddess despite being like slightly bigger than my foot.

Lol. That's what happens when new gods take over. The old ones shrink into cats.

[The Final Negotiator]

I'm sorry, Negotiator, but those names just aren't ridiculous enough.

Boo-boo, Tazmo, and Damnit Get Back Here are all wonderful additions.

I add Mr. Goodpants to the collection.

OK, I forgot I called Zoro "Mr. Monkeypants" and "Mr. Fuzzypants" a while ago, due to his coat on his hindquarters looking like pants. I also joke around about the sounds he makes. He doesn't "meow", he says "mow" (no "E" in it), "rowl", and his best noise "mah-woo". So, I call him "Mow" (not Mao), "Raul" (Rah-ool), or "Mahwoo"... I often call him "Mahwoo", since he "says" that so much...

My "baby" sister (technically, she's 30 now) calls my parents cat "Piglet". Something having to do with her pink nose, hearty appetite, and her tendency to rest her belly on the floor... I would call Misty "Monkey" sometimes, because of how she would jump and climb on stuff, and how her tail looked like it was prehensil... I remember fondly how, when I was at the PC, she as a kitten would climb my pantleg (ouch), fall asleep in my lap (awww), and fart....OK, maybe they're not all fond memories... She would climb up to the speakers when I played the song "Like Humans Do" by David Burne (the one that came with Win XP)...

One of my cats is named after a celtic war goddess despite being like slightly bigger than my foot.

Lol. That's what happens when new gods take over. The old ones shrink into cats.

Mine looks like a lion shrunk into a house cat. Just the same, he's  2-ft. long and a foot tall sitting/walking. Very energetic... Very vocal... Very friendly... Very staticky... (ouch!)

My wife found both Zorro (Disney) and Zoro (One Piece) funny... Another problem solved by YouTube...

[Wazpy]

I like giving pets very mundane sounding names like: Martin Barkins or Dan Woofstien.

That way when I get angry, I can feel like an important boss and scream, "BARKINS! GET YOUR ASS IN MY OFFICE!"

[R. Daniel 01]

So basically, Wazpy, what you're telling me is that you're a genius.

Better, Final Negotiator. Better.

Scrunchypoop.

[The Final Negotiator]

So basically, Wazpy, what you're telling me is that you're a genius.

Better, Final Negotiator. Better.

Scrunchypoop.

OK, I bow to the master... However, I humbly submit "Figment" as in "figment of your imagination", which I call my parent's cat when she sneaks into prohibited rooms, like the dining room. She'd sneak in, my mom would hear us laughing, and yell over "Is she in the dining room again?!?", Then I'd yell jokingly, "No, it's just a figment of your imagination", turn to Misty, and say "Hi, Figment!", and she'd reply "Mawr!"

[R. Daniel 01]

Ohoho, I am definitely not a master at this. There can be no such authority; it'd defeat the purpose. If there were big, scary Masters of Silly Names, there would be opinions to please and fear, and that is entirely not the point.

[Sharpshooter005]

I like giving pets very mundane sounding names like: Martin Barkins or Dan Woofstien.

That way when I get angry, I can feel like an important boss and scream, "BARKINS! GET YOUR ASS IN MY OFFICE!"

Do you ever demand their badge, or accuse them of being a loose cannon

[R. Daniel 01]

I like giving pets very mundane sounding names like: Martin Barkins or Dan Woofstien.

That way when I get angry, I can feel like an important boss and scream, "BARKINS! GET YOUR ASS IN MY OFFICE!"

Do you ever demand their badge, or accuse them of being a loose cannon

And their gun. Their cute, chicken-flavored, squeaky little gun.

No, Barkins, the barrel points AWAY from your mouth!
*squeak*
This is exactly what I'm talking about!

[The Final Negotiator]

I like giving pets very mundane sounding names like: Martin Barkins or Dan Woofstien.

Yeah, sometimes I just call Misty the cat "Friend".  She sneaks upstairs, and I say "Hey, look it's a friend. Hi, Friend." Of course she then says "Mawr..." because she always has to "have the last word".

Ohoho, I am definitely not a master at this. There can be no such authority; it'd defeat the purpose. If there were big, scary Masters of Silly Names, there would be opinions to please and fear, and that is entirely not the point.

What can I say? I respect those with extraordinary brainstorming capacity... I meant master as in a humble master of arts...in goofy naming. I picture an ancient temple, high on a hill, with orange-robed monks, calling each other "monkeybutt", "fuzzyhead", "the fuzzmaster", etc...

Scrunchypoop.

Called Zoro "Googlebutt" this morning, since he runs to the upstairs bathroom, and puts on his "wide-eyed cute kitten face", hoping someone will turn on the water a trickle, so that he can get his daily drink. Yeah, very spoiled... No matter the age, every cat can do the "kitten face" thing for food/attention. Dogs will just act perky and happy, like Odie.

I forgot we had a male orange half-lop rabbit (picture a Cessna flying to the left, such was his ear situation), that I called "Twinky" (his real name was Sunny). He would run figure-8's around your ankles, make "hmmm....hmmm...hmmm" humming noises (a type of rabbit communication), and if he felt threatened (which was alot, since he was paranoid), he would kick his hind feet out to the side and piss sideways...across your ankles... Yeah, they aren't all fun memories...

I also named the largest of a school of pet creek chubs "Pickle". (My sister and her boyfriend brought them home.) It didn't hurt that these creek chubs were green in color...

[Yuko-san]

I called my dog, 8 ball just so you know which one, Sir Farts a lot yesterday.
And I call brooke fuzzy pants and fuzzy butt.

I called my friends Chihuahua Pissy Smelly. He smelled like piss.